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Writing > Improving Sentences

Part or all of the following sentence is underlined; beneath the sentence are five ways of phrasing the underlined material. Select the option that produces the best sentence. If you think the original phrasing produces a better sentence than any of the alternatives, select choice A.  

Upon winning her third gold medal at the competition, the young athlete learned that her accomplishments had surpassed her coach’s, a former track star.

Answer Choices

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Choice (C) is correct.  This version of the sentence correctly compares the young athlete’s accomplishments with her coach’s accomplishments, not with her coach.  In addition, it uses the plural pronoun “those” to refer to the coach’s accomplishments, which allows the noun “coach” to be correctly modified by the noun phrase “a former track star.”  The possessive noun “coach’s” cannot be modified by a noun phrase.

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